Vulgar words in The Prose Works of Jonathan Swift, D.D. — Volume 04 - Swift's Writings on Religion and the Church — Volume 2 (Page 1)
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~ ~ ~ Sentence 307 ~ ~ ~
"For had he not pointed me out, I had slept till E'en Doomsday, a poor insignificant reptile; Half lawyer, half actor, pert, dull, and inglorious, Obscure, and unheard of--but now I'm notorious: Fame has but two gates, a white and a black one; The worst they can say is, I got in at the back one: If the end be obtained 'tis equal what portal I enter, since I'm to be render'd immortal: So clysters applied to the anus, 'tis said, By skilful physicians, give ease to the head-- Though my title be spurious, why should I be dastard, A man is a man though he should be a bastard.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 308 ~ ~ ~
Why sure 'tis some comfort that heroes should slay us, If I fall, I would fall by the hand of Aeneas; And who by the Drapier would not rather damn'd be, Than demigoddized by madrigal Namby.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 2,051 ~ ~ ~
But in these small-parish charity-schools which have no support, but the casual goodwill of charitable people, I do altogether disapprove the custom of putting the children 'prentice, except to the very meanest trades; otherwise the poor honest citizen, who is just able to bring up his child, and pay a small sum of money with him to a good master, is wholly defeated, and the bastard issue, perhaps, of some beggar preferred before him.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 2,255 ~ ~ ~
4 Like chaff with every wind disperst:(1) (1) "Disp_u_rst," [rhyming with "curst"] Pronounce this like a blockhead.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 2,551 ~ ~ ~
The water, on the contrary, is of such a subtile, piercing cold, that, unless it be mingled with a proportion of the spirits, it will sink almost through every thing it is put into, and seems to be of the same nature as the water mentioned by Quintus Curtius, which says the historian, could be contained in nothing but in the hoof, or (as the Oxford Manuscript has it) the skull of an ass.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 2,682 ~ ~ ~
[S.]] "Though he cringed to his deanship in very low strains, To others he boasted of knocking out brains, And slitting of noses, and cropping of ears, While his own ass's zags were more fit for the shears.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 2,848 ~ ~ ~
I forbear mentioning the private confessions of particular ladies to their husbands; for as their children were born in wedlock, and of consequence are legitimate, it would be an invidious task to record them as bastards; and particularly after their several husbands have so charitably forgiven them.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 2,858 ~ ~ ~
They drank, they whored, they swore, they lied, they cheated, they quarrelled, they murdered.