Vulgar words in Flowers from a Persian Garden and Other Papers (Page 1)
This book at a glance
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I Man a Laughing Animal--Antiquity of Popular Jests--'Night and Day'--The Plain-featured Bride--The House of Condolence--The Blind Man's Wife--Two Witty Persian Ladies--Woman's Counsel--The Turkish Jester: in the Pulpit; the Cauldron; the Beggar; the Drunken Governor; the Robber; the Hot Broth--Muslim Preachers and Misers II The Two Deaf Men and the Traveller--The Deaf Persian and the Horseman--Lazy Servants--Chinese Humour: The Rich Man and the Smiths; How to keep Plants alive; Criticising a Portrait--The Persian Courtier and his old Friend--The Scribe--The Schoolmaster and the Wit--The Persian and his Cat--A List of Blockheads--The Arab and his Camel--A Witty BaghdádÃ--The Unlucky Slippers III The Young Merchant of Baghdád; or, the Wiles of Woman IV Ashaab the Covetous--The Stingy Merchant and the Hungry Bedouin--The Sect of Samradians--The Story-teller and the King--Royal Gifts to Poets--The Persian Poet and the Impostor--'Stealing Poetry'--The Rich Man and the Poor Poet V Unlucky Omens--The Old Man's Prayer--The Old Woman in the Mosque--The Weeping Turkmans--The Ten Foolish Peasants--The Wakeful Servant--The Three Dervishes--The Oilman's Parrot--The Moghul and his Parrot--The Persian Shopkeeper and the Prime Minister--Hebrew Facetiæ TALES OF A PARROT.
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I General Plan of Eastern Story-books--The _Tútí Náma_, or Parrot-Book--The Frame-story--The Stolen Images--The Woman carved out of Wood--The Man whose Mare was kicked by a Merchant's Horse II The Emperor's Dream--The Golden Apparition--The Four Treasure-seekers III The Singing Ass: the Foolish Thieves: the Faggot-maker and the Magic Bowl IV The Goldsmith who lost his Life through Covetousness--The King who died of Love for a Merchant's Daughter--The Discovery of Music--The Seven Requisites of a Perfect Woman V The Princess of Rome and her Son--The Seven Vazírs VI The Tree of Life--Legend of Rájá Rasálú--Conclusion _ADDITIONAL NOTE:_ The Magic Bowl, etc.
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If the ass that carried Jesus Christ were to be taken to Mecca, at his return he would still be an ass."
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You would say the croaking of the crow in the desert was the burden of his song, and that this verse of the Kurán was intended for him, "Verily the most detestable of sounds is the braying of an ass."
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When this ass of a preacher brayed, it made Persepolis tremble.
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The alchemist died of poverty and distress, while the blockhead found a treasure under a ruin.
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In the following passage the man of learning and virtue is contrasted with the stupid and ignorant blockhead: "If a wise man, falling into company with mean people, does not get credit for his discourse, be not surprised, for the sound of the harp cannot overpower the noise of the drum, and the fragrance of ambergris is overcome by fetid garlic.
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The wise man is like the druggist's chest, silent, but full of virtues; while the blockhead resembles the warrior's drum, noisy, but an empty prattler.
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Certainly laughter is peculiar to our species; and gravity is as certainly not always a token of profound wisdom; for The gravest beast's an ass; The gravest bird's an owl; The gravest fish's an oyster; And the gravest man's a _fool_.
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"My sister is much handsomer than I; she is coming after me--go and make love to her."
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II THE TWO DEAF MEN AND THE TRAVELLER--THE DEAF PERSIAN AND THE HORSEMAN--LAZY SERVANTS--CHINESE HUMOUR: THE RICH MAN AND THE SMITHS; HOW TO KEEP PLANTS ALIVE; CRITICISING A PORTRAIT--THE PERSIAN COURTIER AND HIS OLD FRIEND--THE SCRIBE--THE SCHOOLMASTER AND THE WIT--THE PERSIAN AND HIS CAT--A LIST OF BLOCKHEADS--THE ARAB AND HIS CAMEL--A WITTY BAGHDÁDÍ--THE UNLUCKY SLIPPERS.
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Some time after this the king, being merry with wine, said to his chief vazír: "Make me out a list of all the blockheads in my kingdom."
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The servant, on hearing this, took the first opportunity to steal his master's horse, and when he was about to ride, brought him an ass with the horse's saddle.
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III THE SINGING ASS: THE FOOLISH THIEVES: THE FAGGOT-MAKER AND THE MAGIC BOWL.
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2573, and the 31st in Kadiri's version), there are two subordinate stories: _The Singing Ass._ At a certain period of time, as ancient historians inform us, an ass and an elk were so fond of each other's company that they were never seen separate.
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One night, during the season of verdure, about the gay termination of spring, after they had rioted in the cup of plenty, and lay rolling on a green carpet of spinach, the cup of the silly ass began to overflow with the froth of conceit, and he thus expressed his unseasonable intentions: "O comrade of the branching antlers, what a mirth-inspiring night is this!
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They are also omitted in the version of the Singing Ass found in the _Panchatantra_ (B. v, F. 7), where a jackal, not an elk, is the companion of the ass, and when he perceives the latter about to "sing" he says: "Let me get to the door of the garden, where I may see the gardener as he approaches, and then sing away as long as you please."
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An ass meets the bull one evening and proposes they should go together and feast themselves to their hearts' content in the king's bean-field, to which the bull replies: "O nephew, as you are wont to let your voice resound, we should run great risk."
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_The King and his Seven Vazírs._ On the Eighth Night the Parrot relates, in a very abridged form, the story of the prince who was falsely accused by one of his father's women of having made love to her, and who was saved by the tales which the royal counsellors related to the king in turn during seven consecutive days.
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When a man had cut off the ear of his neighbour's ass, the judge said to the owner: "Let him have the ass till the ear is grown again, that it may be returned to thee as thou wishest."
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The stranger had with him an ass, bearing a valuable saddle to which was strapped a large bale of merchandise.
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Then comes the _matrimonial state_, when the poor _man_, like a patient ass, is obliged, however reluctantly, to toil and labour for a living.
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'Ah, blockhead!' said the prince to him.
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Waking, he finds he can say _bous_, _onos_, _dikella_, (ox, ass, mattock).
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Returning home, and explaining why he had not been ordained, his father told him that he must be an ass if he could not tell who was the father of the four sons of Aymon.
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The veteran thus gravely addressed the king: "Sire, when your father, of glorious memory, did me the honour to consult me in grave State matters, he first dismissed the buffoons and stage-dancers from the presence-chamber."
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Ass, the singing, 149.
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Blockheads, list of, 80.
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Learned man and blockhead, 49; youth, modesty of, 27.
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Singing Ass, 149.