Vulgar words in Despair's Last Journey (Page 1)
This book at a glance
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Next, he began to untie the cords which fastened the canvas bale, muttering 'Damn the thing!' at intervals, as the knots refused to yield to his unskilful handling.
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'Paul Armstrong: the Autobiography of an Ass.'
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Whether Paul were a greater ass than most imaginative boys of his years may be a question, but he was as serious about this matter as if he had been eight-and-twenty, and when he reached home he had been rejected and had died of it, and accepted and married many times over.
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'But the varnish is costly, my credit is nowhere worth a tinker's damn, and I live in a chronic impecuniosity.'
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He described a visit received from Lord Off-his-Chump, Lady Off-her-Chump, and all the honourable Misses Off-their-Chumps.
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That about the size of it?'
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'Yes,' said Paul, 'that's about the size of it.'
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He sorted and classified in the light of experience: the honeyed, the acidulated, and bibulous-godly (mostly Scottish), the bibulous-ungodly (mostly English), the slut with a clean outside to things, the painstaking sloven, the peculative (here one majestic sample), the reduced in circumstances, the confidential, the reserved, the frisky, the motherly, the step-motherly--a most excellent assembly for mirth and pity.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 4,474 ~ ~ ~
Paul, who was at that instant bending all the force of his mind upon Captain MacMadden, and punching his head in visioned combat, turned on him with a passionate 'Damn your impertinence, sir!' which set the startled gentleman agape with wonder.
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'Well, look here, Claudia, damn it all!
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'Damn you!' said Paul.
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or, as sure as the brother of the sun reigns over the Heavenly Empire, I will brain you with the poker.
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She was neither pleased nor affronted by the vacuous ass's compliments, and when he praised her hair and her complexion, she accepted it as placidly as if she had been a waxen lady in a barber's window.
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He and Annette went to the Mabille together, and in his character of man of the world he made love to her with as fine a relish as if he had sat down to bread-and-water after dinner; then, in order not to be quite a blackguard, he met her again, and, to save himself from his own conscience, again, and at last the compound of vanity, weakness, and virtue landed him with her in London, where they set up housekeeping together.
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To my mind, the man who derides it is, so far as his derision carries him, an ass.'
~ ~ ~ Sentence 6,364 ~ ~ ~
From Lais in her jewelled litter to Cora in her English landau in the Bois, and on to the shabbiest small slut who flaunts her raddle and her broken feather in the slums of London, the same story is told and the same moral preached.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 6,579 ~ ~ ~
He wrote reams of letters, all of which might have been printed without harm to anybody; but by-and-by his passion began to carry him off his feet, as passion has carried stronger men than he, and the fever of his pulses got into his ink, and he began to make love, but with a dreadful guardedness and a deadly fear lest he should offend the susceptibilities of this creature of the skies.
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He did not make love in the sense of seeking to persuade his goddess to descend to him, but he made no further disguise of himself, and he was not again reproved.
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If you find my conversation distasteful, just damn my eyes and go.
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'Oh, damn it all!' he said to himself desperately.
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Exactly what this gifted and amiable young ass of a Bostonian was doing, and saying, and thinking, and feeling, he had been doing, saying, thinking, feeling a year ago.
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Let me begin by telling you that for some three years of my life, more or less, I made an unexampled ass of myself about a certain lady.
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You know now the truth about me, and you know that in spite of it I have made love to you for months past.
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She has written of you in her letters from time to time, but never led me to fancy that you were making love to her.
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I am by way of being a cleric, but I don't always cut my linguistic coat to suit my cloth, and my word at this hour is, Damn the bestial ecclesiastical bigotry which seeks to tie the bodies of men and women together when their souls are sundered!
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'I took a fancy to declaim a favourite little bit of Euripides in Endell Street, and a uniformed ass came along and ran me in.