Vulgar words in The Book of Anecdotes and Budget of Fun; - containing a collection of over one thousand of the most - laughable sayings and jokes of celebrated wits and - humorists. (Page 1)
This book at a glance
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~ ~ ~ Sentence 266 ~ ~ ~
"Not U, but I, blockhead!"
~ ~ ~ Sentence 268 ~ ~ ~
You mean to say, that not I but you are a blockhead?"
~ ~ ~ Sentence 271 ~ ~ ~
"Just as you please," quietly responded Pat, "fool or blockhead--it's no matter, so long as yer free to own it!"
~ ~ ~ Sentence 1,166 ~ ~ ~
I SHALL be off to the Highlands this fall; but cuss 'em, they han't got no woods there; nuthin' but heather, and that's only high enough to tear your clothes.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 1,487 ~ ~ ~
"Rot that good-for-nothing gal!" ejaculated the indignant son; "she called me a cabbage head, and I'll be darned if ever I go to see her again."
~ ~ ~ Sentence 1,965 ~ ~ ~
A FOP in company, wanting his servant, called out: "Where's that blockhead of mine?"
~ ~ ~ Sentence 2,513 ~ ~ ~
Offended at this liberty, Bouret said instantly, "Sir, you are an ass."
~ ~ ~ Sentence 3,015 ~ ~ ~
A NEGRO, whom Dr. Franklin brought over from America, observed, that the only gentleman in this country was the hog--"Everything work: _man_ work, _woman_ work, _horse_ work, _bullock_ work, _ass_ work, _fire_ work, _water_ work, _smoke_ work, _dog_ work, _cat_ work; but the _hog_, he eat, he sleep, he do nothing all day--he be the only gentleman in England."
~ ~ ~ Sentence 3,239 ~ ~ ~
AN ignorant rector had occasion to wait on a bishop, who was so incensed at his stupidity that he exclaimed, "What _blockhead_ gave you a living?"
~ ~ ~ Sentence 3,260 ~ ~ ~
THE following advertisement was some years ago posted up at North Shields: "Whereas several idle and disorderly persons have lately made a practice of riding on an ass belonging to Mr. ----, the head of the Ropery stairs; now, lest any accident should happen, he takes this method of informing the public, that he has determined _to shoot his said ass_, and cautions any person who may be riding on it at the time, to take care of himself, lest by some unfortunate mistake he should shoot the _wrong one_."
~ ~ ~ Sentence 3,268 ~ ~ ~
The fellow, with characteristic insolence, exclaimed, "Damn your spectacles!"
~ ~ ~ Sentence 4,183 ~ ~ ~
A SON of Erin, while hunting for rabbits, came across a jackass in the woods, and shot him.
~ ~ ~ Sentence 4,244 ~ ~ ~
"No, I'll be darned if you have!" bawled out Jonathan, "for here it is, safe and sound."