The 15,767 occurrences of ass

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~   ~   ~   Sentence 55   ~   ~   ~

GOTHAMITE DROLLERIES (_continued_): The simpleton and the sharpers--The schoolmaster's lady-love--The judge and the thieves--The calf's head--The Kashmírí and his store of rice-- The Turkish noodle: the kerchief; the caftan; the wolf's tail; the right hand and the left; the stolen cheese; the moon in the well--The good dreams--Chinese noodles: the lady and her husband; the stolen spade; the relic-hunter--Indian noodles: the fools and the mosquitoes; the fools and the palm-trees; the servants and the trunks; taking care of the door; the fool and the aloes-wood; the fool and the cotton; the cup lost in the sea; the fool and the thieves; the simpletons who ate the buffalo; the princess who was made to grow; the washerman's ass transformed; the foolish herdsman--Noodle-stories moralised--The brothers and their heritage--Sowing roasted sesame 81-120 CHAPTER V. THE SILLY SON: Simple Simon--The Norse booby--The Russian booby--The Japanese noodle-- The Arabian idiot--The English silly son--The Sinhalese noodle with the robbers--The Italian booby--The Arab simpleton and his cow--The Russian fool and the birch-tree--The silly wife deceived by her husband--The Indian fool on the tree-branch--The Indian monk who believed he was dead--The Florentine fool and the young men--The Indian silly son as a fisher; as a messenger; killing a mosquito; as a pupil--The best of the family--The doctor's apprentice 121-170 CHAPTER VI.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 78   ~   ~   ~

They were Gothamites, too, those men of Abdera who punished a runaway ass for having got into the gymnasium and upset the olive oil.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 79   ~   ~   ~

Having brought all the asses of the town together, as a caution, they flogged the delinquent ass before his fellows.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 112   ~   ~   ~

"[2] Not unlike some of our "Joe Millers" is the following: A citizen of Cumæ, on an ass, passed by an orchard, and seeing a branch of a fig-tree loaded with delicious fruit, he laid hold of it, but the ass went on, leaving him suspended.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 499   ~   ~   ~

We have already seen that the men of Abdera (p. 5) flogged an ass before its fellows for upsetting a jar of olive oil, but what is that compared with the story of the ass that drank up the moon?

~   ~   ~   Sentence 500   ~   ~   ~

According to Ludovicus Vives, a learned Spanish writer, certain townspeople imprisoned an ass for drinking up the moon, whose reflection, appearing in the water, was covered with a cloud while the ass was drinking.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 738   ~   ~   ~

The sharper answered, "I was thy ass; but hear my story, for it is wonderful.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 741   ~   ~   ~

I was transformed into an ass.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 746   ~   ~   ~

His wife, in hopes of propitiating Heaven, gave alms and offered up many prayers to avert evil from them, on account of their having used a human being as an ass.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 747   ~   ~   ~

At length the simpleton, having remained idle at home for some time, went one day to the market to purchase another ass, and on entering the place where all the animals were fastened, he saw with astonishment his old ass offered for sale.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 778   ~   ~   ~

So I fell in love with her; but two days after, the same man passed, singing the following couplet: "'Ass and Umm Amr' went their way, Nor she nor ass returned for aye.'

~   ~   ~   Sentence 935   ~   ~   ~

A favourite story in various parts of India, near akin to that last cited, is of a poor washerman and his young ass.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 942   ~   ~   ~

It happened, when the day came on which he was to receive his young ass transformed into a fine, well-educated boy, the simpleton was kept busy with his customers' clothes, but on the day following he found time to go to the teacher, who told him it was most unfortunate he had not come at the appointed hour, since the youth had quitted the school yesterday, refusing to submit any longer to authority; but the teacher had just learned that he had been made kází (or judge) in Cawnpore.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,102   ~   ~   ~

This last exquisite jest has its analogue in that of the Irishman who was riding on an ass one fine day, when the beast, by kicking at the flies that annoyed him, got one of its hind feet entangled in the stirrup, whereupon the rider dismounted, saying, "Faith, if you're going to get up, it's time I was getting down."

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,757   ~   ~   ~

The barber published everywhere what had happened at our house; and the villain added to the story that I had caught her with another man, which was the cause of my having her shaved; and people were no doubt expecting, according to our custom in such a case, to see her mounted on an ass, with her face turned towards the tail.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,758   ~   ~   ~

They came running to my dwelling from all quarters, and actually brought an ass to make the usual exhibition in the streets.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,182   ~   ~   ~

Ass and the Two Sharpers, 81.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,317   ~   ~   ~

Moon swallowed by an ass, 46.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,381   ~   ~   ~

Washerman and his young Ass, 103.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 5,806   ~   ~   ~

iii, where Maria calls Malvolio 'an affectioned ass, that cons state without book and utters it by great swarths') is as much hay as the mower can cut at one movement of the scythe.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,630   ~   ~   ~

The fact was, that about this time the community, like Balaam's ass, began to grow more enlightened than its rider, and to show a disposition for what is called "self-government."

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,673   ~   ~   ~

These discarded pipes altogether, and took up chewing tobacco; hence they were called Quids; an appellation since given to those political mongrels which sometimes spring up between two great parties, as a mule is produced between a horse and an ass.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 6,231   ~   ~   ~

He never denied her any request that ever she made, except one, and this was, that our Bible might be hung about the neck of an ass, and so beaten about the town of Agra.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 870   ~   ~   ~

Perenna shrugged his shoulders: "Alexandre, you're an ass.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,479   ~   ~   ~

"You silly ass!" growled Don Luis.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,480   ~   ~   ~

"How is it possible to be such an ass!

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,494   ~   ~   ~

"But there's not the least clue, you ass!"

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,116   ~   ~   ~

"Alexandre, you're an ass."

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,498   ~   ~   ~

He simply said in a sententious tone: "One ass and you make a pair of asses; and there are as many asses as there are people who try to do police work with bits of paper, signatures, warrants, and other gammon.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,966   ~   ~   ~

"Let go, you ass!" roared Don Luis.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 4,041   ~   ~   ~

"You infernal ass!

~   ~   ~   Sentence 293   ~   ~   ~

They say, of all animals the lion is the chief; and of beasts the ass is the meanest; yet, with the concurrence of the wise, the burden-bearing ass is preferable to the man-devouring lion.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 294   ~   ~   ~

"The poor ass, though devoid of understanding, will be held precious when carrying a burden; oxen and asses that carry loads are preferable to men that injure their fellow-creatures."

~   ~   ~   Sentence 482   ~   ~   ~

Behold a religious man, who threw a patched cloak over his shoulders; he made the covering of the Cabah the housing of an ass.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 557   ~   ~   ~

many a fleet horse perished by the way, and that lame ass reached the end of the journey.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 599   ~   ~   ~

If thou hast no taste to relish this, thou art a cross-grained brute.--Now that the camel is elated with rapture and delight, if a man is insensible to these he is an ass.--_The zephyr, gliding through the verdure on the earth, shakes the twig of the ban-tree, but moves not the solid rock_.--Whatever thou beholdest is loud in extolling him.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 877   ~   ~   ~

I replied: "It is a vile epistle which has been written in golden letters:--'_Verily this ass, with the resemblance of a man, has the carcase of a calf, and the voice or bleating of a calf_.'

~   ~   ~   Sentence 936   ~   ~   ~

You might say that the croaking of the raven of the desert was the burden of his chant, and this text of the Koran expressive of his manner:--_The most abominable of noises is the braying of an ass:--"Whenever this ass of a preacher sets up a braying, his voice will make the city of Istakhar, or Persepolis, shake to its base_."

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,174   ~   ~   ~

In bestowing a dinar he will stickle like an ass in the mire; but ask him to read the Al-hamdi, or first chapter of the Koran, and he will recite it a hundred times."

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,180   ~   ~   ~

Were they to take the ass of Jesus to Mecca, on his return from that pilgrimage he would still be an ass.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,234   ~   ~   ~

He decreed: "This man has no redress, for had he not been an ass he would not have applied to a horse or ass doctor!"

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,265   ~   ~   ~

That ass proceeds all the lighter on his journey on whom they load the lightest burden:--the poor dervish, who suffers under a load of indigence, will in like sort enter the gates of death with an easy burden; but with him who luxuriates in peace, plenty, and affluence, it must be a real hardship to die amidst all these comforts.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,288   ~   ~   ~

In common, such as are in indigent circumstances will contaminate the skirt of innocency with sin; and such as are suffering from hunger will steal bread:--When a ravenous dog has found a piece of meat, he asks not, saying: Is this the flesh of the prophet Salah's camel or Antichrist's ass?

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,293   ~   ~   ~

Nor do they ever condescend to return any person's salutation, unmindful of the maxim of the wise: That whoever is inferior to others in humility, and is their superior in opulence, though in appearance he be rich, yet in reality he is a beggar:--If a worthless fellow, because of his wealth, treats a learned man with insolence, reckon him an ass, although he be the ambergris ox."

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,403   ~   ~   ~

A fool was undertaking the instruction of an ass, and had devoted his whole time to this occupation.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,525   ~   ~   ~

_Sir Oliver_.--I wish heartily He would pack them off, and send them anywhere on ass-back or cart, (cart preferably,) to rid our country of 'em.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,313   ~   ~   ~

There is an affectation among the vulgar clever, of wearing the _moustache_, which they clip and cut _à la Vandyk_: this is useful, as affording a ready means of distinguishing between a man of talent and an ass--the former, trusting to his head, goes clean shaved, and looks like an Englishman: the latter, whose strength lies altogether in his hair, exhausts the power of Macassar in endeavouring to make himself as like an ourang-outang as possible.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,402   ~   ~   ~

He affects a patronizing air at small tea-parties, and is wonderfully run after by wretched un-idea'd girls, that is, by ten girls in twelve; he is eternally striving to get upon the "staff," or anyhow to shirk his regimental duty; he is a whelp towards the men under his command, and has a grand idea of spurs, steel scabbards, and flogging; to his superiors he is a spaniel, to his brother officers an intolerable ass; he makes the mess-room a perfect hell with his vanity, puppyism, and senseless bibble-babble.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 230   ~   ~   ~

There is a story that a high Persian official called out to a boy, whose gang of burden-bearing donkeys obstructed his carriage, 'Out of the way, ass, you driver of asses!' and was promptly answered, 'You are an ass yourself, though a driver of men!'

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,807   ~   ~   ~

Hist Ass., Washington, for 1899, Vol.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 385   ~   ~   ~

The other day I was translating to a young Raja what Val Prinsep had said about him in his "Purple India"; he had only said that he was a dissipated young ass and as ugly as a baboon; but the boy was quite hurt and began to cry, and I had to send for the Political Agent to quiet him and put him to sleep.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,310   ~   ~   ~

"What an ass I am!" he said, in disgust--"not to be able to drive the car.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,619   ~   ~   ~

"Then everybody is an ass!" said Peter violently, turning upon her.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 4,891   ~   ~   ~

He made even an ignorant ass like me sit up.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 6,147   ~   ~   ~

Ass!

~   ~   ~   Sentence 7,783   ~   ~   ~

He was a doddering old ass when he came to consult the oracle.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 693   ~   ~   ~

'I may be ass enough to walk into a ground-circuit,' said Arnott, 'but I don't dismiss my Fleet till I'm reasonably sure that trouble is over.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,241   ~   ~   ~

Be quick, you dithering ass!'

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,508   ~   ~   ~

'If I've made one ass of myself, I shall take extra care to make asses of you!' said Wontner.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,564   ~   ~   ~

Then he picked himself up from the sofa and said: 'I want to apologise, sir, to you and the Mess for having been such an ass ever since I joined!'

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,103   ~   ~   ~

The quivering chin, the bitten lip, The cold and sweating brow, Later may yearn for fellowship-- Not now, you ass, not now!

~   ~   ~   Sentence 4,710   ~   ~   ~

'Yes; but why did you tell me delubris was "deluges," you silly ass?' said Winton.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 4,817   ~   ~   ~

'Curse you for a silly ass!' said Winton.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 5,065   ~   ~   ~

'You utter ass!' said Mullins, and caught him by the back of his stiff neck and ran him down to the hall where the sub-prefects, who sit below the salt, made him welcome with the economical bloater-paste of mid-term.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 31   ~   ~   ~

- Pietro di Vinciolo goes from home to sup: his wife brings a boy into the house to bear her company: Pietro returns, and she hides her gallant under a hen-coop: Pietro explains that in the house of Ercolano, with whom he was to have supped, there was discovered a young man bestowed there by Ercolano's wife: the lady thereupon censures Ercolano's wife: but unluckily an ass treads on the fingers of the boy that is hidden under the hen-coop, so that he cries for pain: Pietro runs to the place, sees him, and apprehends the trick played on him by his wife, which nevertheless he finally condones, for that he is not himself free from blame.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 691   ~   ~   ~

-- Pietro di Vinciolo goes from home to sup: his wife brings a boy into the house to bear her company: Pietro returns, and she hides her gallant under a hen-coop: Pietro explains that in the house of Ercolano, with whom he was to have supped, there was discovered a young man bestowed there by Ercolano's wife: the lady thereupon censures Ercolano's wife: but unluckily an ass treads on the fingers of the boy that is hidden under the hen-coop, so that he cries for pain: Pietro runs to the place, sees him, and apprehends the trick played on him by his wife, which nevertheless he finally condones, for that he is not himself free from blame.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 939   ~   ~   ~

And to assure yourself that herein I say sooth, you have but to consider the Baronci, how they differ from the rest of mankind, who all have faces well composed and duly proportioned, whereas of the Baronci you will see one with a face very long and narrow, another with a face inordinately broad, one with a very long nose, another with a short one, one with a protruding and upturned chin, and great jaws like an ass's; and again there will be one that has one eye larger than its fellow, or set on a lower plane; so that their faces resemble those that children make when they begin to learn to draw.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,182   ~   ~   ~

But, as neither she nor Federigo was minded that this beginning should also be the end of their intercourse, and that it might not be needful for the maid to go each time to make the assignation with him, they came to the following understanding; to wit, that as often as he came and went between the house and an estate that he had a little higher up, he should keep an eye on a vineyard that was beside the house, where he would see an ass's head stuck on one of the poles of the vineyard, and as often as he observed the muzzle turned towards Florence, he might visit her without any sort of misgiving; and if he found not the door open, he was to tap it thrice, and she would open it; and when he saw the muzzle of the ass's head turned towards Fiesole, he was to keep away, for then Gianni would be there.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,631   ~   ~   ~

but thou shalt no more be vexed with the tedious drivel of a petty dealer in ass's dung, some blackguard, belike, that came hither from the country because he was dismissed the service of some petty squire, clad in romagnole, with belfry-breeches, and a pen in his arse, and for that he has a few pence, must needs have a gentleman's daughter and a fine lady to wife, and set up a coat of arms, and say:--'I am of the such and such,' and 'my ancestors did thus and thus.'

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,859   ~   ~   ~

And if of a Sunday morning he espied her in church, he strove might and main to acquit himself of his Kyrie and Sanctus in the style of a great singer, albeit his performance was liker to the braying of an ass: whereas, if he saw her not, he scarce exerted himself at all.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,862   ~   ~   ~

Now it so befell that one day, when the priest at high noon was aimlessly gadding about the village, he encountered Bentivegna del Mazzo at the tail of a well laden ass; and greeted him, asking him whither he was going.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,916   ~   ~   ~

And look to it that whatever he may have a mind to, were it our very ass, he be never denied."

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,560   ~   ~   ~

By the Gospels there is never a physician in this city that has the lore of ass's urine by heart as he has: verily, thou wouldst not find his like between here and the gates of Paris.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,609   ~   ~   ~

'Tis no fault of yours, if we, that did our best to honour and pleasure you, have not come by a dog's death; your faithlessness has cost us to-night as many sound blows as would more than suffice to keep an ass a trotting all the way from here to Rome; besides which, we have been in peril of expulsion from the company in which we arranged for your enrolment.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,222   ~   ~   ~

And so it befell that he clapped up a close acquaintance with one Pietro da Tresanti, who plied the same trade as he, albeit instead of a mare he had but an ass; whom in token of friendship and good-fellowship Dom Gianni after the Apulian fashion called ever Gossip Pietro, and had him to his house and there lodged and honourably entreated him as often as he came to Barletta.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,226   ~   ~   ~

The young woman, wondering but believing, told her husband what the priest had said, adding:--"If he is even such a friend as thou sayst, why dost thou not get him to teach thee the enchantment, so that thou mayst turn me into a mare, and have both ass and mare for thine occasions?

~   ~   ~   Sentence 957   ~   ~   ~

"I'm an ass, and I'm sorry and I'm not.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 4,613   ~   ~   ~

250 A good ass, side saddle, etc.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 4,618   ~   ~   ~

each) at 15 D. per bale, 750 Vegetables and fruit sold at the bazar, aver age 2 D. per day, during four years, 2,920 Fowls and ducks 2000 at ½ D. 1,000 Thirty goats sold, 180 Thirty hogs, 600 At the end of 5 years, the plantation, buildings, etc., will probably bring, 7,000 Probable value of the slaves, 5,500 Pigs, goats, and poultry remaining, 260 Horse, ass, etc.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,609   ~   ~   ~

When the messenger reached the gate, he found no other creature near the place but a poor sickly-looking ass, in search of a scanty meal from the stunted grass, which was dried up by the scorching sun, and blasts of hot wind which at that season prevailed.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,615   ~   ~   ~

The men went, and on their return informed the King that the only living creature near the gate was an ass, poor and manged, seeking a scanty meal from the parched blades of grass.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,620   ~   ~   ~

The plaintiff and defendant were then placed side by side before the throne, when the King demanded, "Why the sick ass was cast out to provide for itself a precarious subsistence?"

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,623   ~   ~   ~

'"Friend," said the King, "when this thine ass was young and healthy, strong and lusty, didst thou not derive benefits from his services?

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,629   ~   ~   ~

'At the expiration of the forty days, the Dhobhie set off from his home to the palace, leading his now lively ass by a cord.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,630   ~   ~   ~

On the road the passers-by were filled with amazement and mirth, at the manners and expressions of the Dhobhie towards his led ass.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 3,633   ~   ~   ~

--"In truth," replied the Dhobhie, "my ass is a very dear old friend, and what is more, he has been a greater expense to me than all my relations latterly: believe me, it has cost me much care and pains to bring this ass into his present excellent condition."

~   ~   ~   Sentence 693   ~   ~   ~

[Footnote 3: Vice was the fool of the old moralities, with his dagger of lath, a long coat, and a cap with a pair of ass's ears.]

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,545   ~   ~   ~

At last the cry went up, "Here He comes!" and to their amazement and disgust the crowd saw Him riding quietly info the City mounted on an ass, without display, pretense or pose.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,466   ~   ~   ~

In short, I was an ass."

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,691   ~   ~   ~

I remimber ould Gilder, when he was our chief in India, used to say that a man who got beyond enjoying beer and a clay pipe at a pinch was either an ass or a coxcomb.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 1,872   ~   ~   ~

You have been speculating on your own hook, you cursed ass!

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,196   ~   ~   ~

If they say little, it naturally follows that they say little that is foolish; their extreme lack of confidence leads them to think a good deal over the remarks that they are obliged to make; and, like Balaam's ass, they speak marvelously to the point if a miracle loosens their tongues.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 6,754   ~   ~   ~

Lucien, smitten with love of Paradox, set himself to mount and ride that unruly hybrid product of Pegasus and Balaam's ass; started out at a gallop over the fields of thought while he took a turn in the Bois, and discovered new possibilities in Blondet's outline.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 2,022   ~   ~   ~

4 The noble and the base Into thy pastures leap; The lion and the stupid ass Conspire to vex thy sheep.

~   ~   ~   Sentence 124   ~   ~   ~

"Look here," said Gatewood almost angrily, "do you suppose that if I were ass enough to go to these people and tell them that I wanted to find my ideal--" "_Don't_ tell them _that_!"

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